Wahlberg and Hollywood Take on Bullying
Set to be released July 23rd, Mark Wahlberg’s new role in Joe Bell captures a father’s long journey into accepting the death of his son while also spreading awareness of the real and terrifying costs of bullying. More specifically, his son is victimized in school by bullies because he’s gay which eventually leads his son to commit suicide. At a time when hatred on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity is so prevalent it has become a part of everyday life, the agony Joe witnesses in his own son’s secret existence is authentic, real and vulnerable. The movie illustrates the importance of perspective taking and a growth mindset and the power we all have to change through inciting our own empathy.
Despite having less face to face social interactions and students spending more time at home with family, one would think that instances of bullying have been reduced. However, this has not been the case. The feelings of social isolation have left teens especially vulnerable and feeling emotionally fragile. For many children and teens, social distancing during the COVID-19 global pandemic means that the majority of contact they have made with their peers has shifted virtually. As a result, they are currently using social media and apps like TikTok, FaceTime, and Zoom a lot more frequently than in the past. Research illustrates a major rise in cyberbullying during the Covid-19 Pandemic. Pandemic stressors can cause kids to lash out or potentially create conflict with others.
At The Meeting House, we recognize how cyber bullying has evolved in the wake of this extended period of social isolation, so we are constantly adapting our curriculum to teach the most relevant tools to foster successful relationships inside and outside of our programs. For our parents and mentors, knowing where to start when discussing bullying can seem like an intimidating task, so below are some helpful tips for being able to identify, discuss, and support your child or teen.
5 Things Parents and Educators Can Do
1) Recognize the early signs that a child or teens is a victim of cyberbullying:
Ask meaningful questions about their experiences online and be on the lookout for signs of trouble which include
➢ Appearing uneasy, nervous or scared about going to school or outside.
➢ Being nervous or jumpy when texting or using social media.
➢ Appearing upset or frustrated after going online or gaming.
➢ Being unwilling to discuss or share information about their online accounts and activity.
2) Promote and normalize conversations surrounding stress and emotions:
How strong is your child or student’s emotional vocabulary? How strong is your emotional vocabulary? Finding the right word to describe a feeling can be a difficult process for us all. Words such as “good” and “bad” provide little information or insight into the child and place value judgments on feelings. Again, we are not here to judge our feelings but rather practice labeling through careful self-awareness and compassion. Using words like frustrated, disappointed, proud, isolated, to give a few examples, help us more fully understand the scope of what a child or teen may be experiencing. Below is a helpful words list from our friend and therapist Hillary Jacobs Hendel.
3) Educate children regarding acceptable language and expected online communication patterns.
What does safe online communication look like? Here are a few helpful tips for safe social networking and online gameplay/communication:
➢ Manage and become familiar with privacy settings
➢ Your social media profile is your brand- Remember what is posted is always posted. Be mindful and thoughtful about the impact of what you are posting or deciding to share with the world. It is always important to think about what message you are sending to other people when you post or comment. Making unfavorable and aggressive comments or posts towards others could leave a child more vulnerable to bullying.
➢ Retaliation is never effective- Just because someone else spreads negativity online, responding with an equally offensive comment is not the solution. Discuss with your children that some people online are looking to get a reaction out of others, so empowering them to disengage and report to an adult is often the best practice in mitigating the situation.
4) Setting limits: How much screen time is too much?
You can curb cyberbullying by limiting screen time where teens are gaming or using social media. Obviously with options for entertainment limited, accomplishing this task is not that easy, but by being creative it can be done. Always remember to allow this to be a collaborative decision and process to avoid the teen or child feeling as though they are being punished. Empower your teen by helping them understand why too much screen time can be potentially dangerous. Develop a pros and cons list with your child regarding screen time. In addition, it is important to set realistic and achievable goals with your child or teen. If you have a child who is currently using technology for social media and gaming purposes upwards of 8 hours a day, how likely and effective would it be to cut that child off completely. Rather, we would set reasonable limits such as going from 8 hours a day down to six hours and so on.
5) Substitute online use with more helpful practices
They also can play online games, have virtual sleepovers, hold a book club, play a virtual game of horse, do bullet journals together, or even bake together while communicating online. Encourage them to get creative and reach out to others to set something up. Visit The Meeting House virtual playground which has a multitude of engaging activities and resources for kids and parents. Our Playground is a place where each child can join together online with their real world friends in a virtual space through music, art, games, yoga and movement, literature, and much more. Parents are also welcome to check out our Parent Time section just for them (click here).
https://www.verywellfamily.com/cyberbullying-increasing-during-global-pandemic-4845901